yellowbear

07 Jul 2010 283 views
 
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Here we see Isambard Tifflet (The engineering Tifflet for those of you who have forgotten) paying a visit to my garden to see a restored bench. He hoped to learn the techniques necessary to enable the renovation of the bench of his master.

He is amazed to learn that this bench is over 5000 years old and was discovered in a salt pit just off Vines Lane in the town of Droitwich. Careful restoration was carried out by a team of dedicated bench restorers (they don't get a lot of work) and you see here, as Isambard did, what a fine job they have done
.

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Here we see Isambard Tifflet (The engineering Tifflet for those of you who have forgotten) paying a visit to my garden to see a restored bench. He hoped to learn the techniques necessary to enable the renovation of the bench of his master.

He is amazed to learn that this bench is over 5000 years old and was discovered in a salt pit just off Vines Lane in the town of Droitwich. Careful restoration was carried out by a team of dedicated bench restorers (they don't get a lot of work) and you see here, as Isambard did, what a fine job they have done
.

comments (23)

  • Ray
  • Thailand
  • 7 Jul 2010, 04:11
Isambard Tifflet really puts his heart into it, doesn't he.

Is this the famous 5000 year old garden bench that was found to contain an embedded GPS radio, powered by a Hamster exercise wheel?

If so, Isambard Tifflet is blessed to have a mentor like you, Bill.
Bill Phillips: His enthusiasm is only exceeded by his incompetence
  • Louis
  • South Africa
  • 7 Jul 2010, 06:50
Isambard and his master just leave the Bench alone!
Bill Phillips: I searched him for tools before letting him anywhere near
  • Chris
  • England
  • 7 Jul 2010, 07:14
This is sheer rubbish, of course, but I have to take a deep breath and admit it is a very accomplished piece of twiddling.
Bill Phillips: Whaddya mean rubbish. Fully researched data with the co-operation of local historian and bench restorer Harry Dowel
Brilliant (again). This reminds me of the song...I left my heart at Bill's house.
Bill Phillips: I hum it all the time Chad
  • zed
  • Australia
  • 7 Jul 2010, 07:52
Good lord get that man away from the bench, we have seen his handycraft...which admittedly is probably better than mine
Bill Phillips: Doubtful Tony. He is a complete incompetent
  • Philine
  • Germany
  • 7 Jul 2010, 08:16
Your story is wonderful, the bench a bijou, the twiddling funny, and Chad is right: "This reminds of the old song" "Ich hab' mein Herz ...verloren"! I remember that Chris placed a red pillow heart on his Ratty-sofa, this should take seat then on his newly restored bench .if he might follow your fine example!
Bill Phillips: I lost my heart in Heidelberg.
awesome

I am thinking that this bench needs some weathering....
Bill Phillips: What part of restoration are you missing here Rob?grin
Great twiddle, great story. Perhaps some kind person could send the bench restorers to Bath. Who knows what treasures or rare species of bug they might find in that rotting wood.
The restorer, you, Isambard Tifflet and Chris could become celebrities (and make it easier for you to recognise them,, re yesterday's reply to me!).
Bill Phillips: They would weep at the sight of the bench. I do not like this celebrity culture that we are subjected to nowadays
Brilliant Bill! Quite amazing in fact.
Bill Phillips: Just a twiddle Richard
love it
Bill Phillips: Thank you very much
Don't you just love that flower!! grin
Bill Phillips: The nice yellow one? best part of the picture
  • vintage
  • Brisbane Australia
  • 7 Jul 2010, 12:09
Real skill capture here
Bill Phillips: A twiddle to amuse I hopesmile
I hope that isn't a Metric tape measure Isambard is using else he will get all messed up when he returns to finish the restoration?? of his masters bench which only has Imperial measurements.
Bill Phillips: It wouldn't matter because he will forget to write it down anyway
Lol, at least his heart is in the right place. I bet his bench will not look as good as this one smile
Bill Phillips: I keep offering to sell him a new one
  • Chris
  • England
  • 7 Jul 2010, 13:22
I hate you - and your damned pig!
Bill Phillips: Mr Pig is very upset...I,on the other hand, couldn't give a toss
  • Chris
  • England
  • 7 Jul 2010, 13:24
And your City & Guilds (stage 1) in twiddling...
Bill Phillips: I got a distinction, you didn't mention that. If you are p***ed off today just wait until tomorrow
well who needs competence when you have enthusiasm I always say wink works great for world leaders.
Bill Phillips: It does indeed Charles
Did it shrink in the process? Looks like he's lost a few inches. Great Fun, the softness makes it quite dream like.
lol superb Bill and fine twiddling m8smile
First off, he needs to learn how to use a tape measure properly smile And you just can't get the wood, you know! (Esoteric quote recognizable to the elderly)
This is a work of art Bill...I love it.
Twiddle humour at its finestsmile
If Chris can do as good a job on his bench as you have done with this twiddle i will pay for him to go on a cruise on the Knott End ferry.It lasts about 5 minutes, thats about 4 mins and 30 seconds longer than his bench would last if he tried to restore it.

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